complaints complaints complaints from niena

its been a wonderful 3 months..

2009-07-04T00:00:00.004+08:00

tup tap tup tap...its already 3 months since we're together....i still remember that day like it was yesterday...wah hahaha =p *our 1st date as a couple*

on that day...both of us plan to wear a decent clothes *we doesnt usually wear one haha* ...he wore a collared petak2 tee while i wore this also collared flowery tee *kira decent la ya than a print tee shirt with goofy words on it* XD

anyhoo...we actually planned to NOT to tell anybody about our relationship as a couple...it's just because i dont want to get teased by our friends...cuz we actually started as friends...and all of my friends at sbh is his friends too....so phm jak lah nak if in one circle of friends, and ada di antara cdak turn out to be couples....mesti KOMPOM KENAK SELAK leh the others...haha =p

ok ok, back to the story...um.masa mkorg still bok knal ya nak, i dont even looked at him...because at that time, i knew he had a girlfriend and he do really loves her......at that time laa =p yaaa masa sem 1....and we started to get close when we are in the 2nd semester...

pahal mekorg leh jd rapat? i dont quite remember how...p all i remember...it was his birthday week...so as a celcom user,he gets a 1 week free calls to his 8pax num...so from there...we bergayut on the phone almost every night...heeee X)

at 1st...i DONT have any feelings for him. i just wanted to be his friend. SERIOUSLY...until la...that incident with his ex...and after mkorg kua sma gik...which is a day before mkorg balit sbh ariya...awal thn this year 2009...then bok la that feeling grows in me...haha XD

i noe its only a 3 months anniversary ....bkn ny 3 years....k pa mok make such a big wuss about it nak?
p for me its really a big deal...cuz...i havent been in a serious relationship in few years nw...
and this relationship is really sumthing for me...heee :D
*ehem ehem*
after 3 bulan mkorg together....i realised that...couples also can be besties...we are now best friends....and also um.lovers....ahah! XD
and after all the
things we shared...
ups and downs...
happy times and sad times...
fights and not fighting...
hate and love...
love and lust...
all i can say is...i love him so much!!!

Aizuddin Izzat
is my friend.
my hero/body guard.
shoulder to cry on.
my second tank.
my other half.
and most importantly...
he is that special someone that will always have a special place in my heart.
*mak jiwang eh!! hehe*

i just can get enough of him... :D

I LOVE YOU BU~! HAPPY 3RD MONTH ANIVERSARY!! XD

Polaroid.

2009-06-26T18:07:00.002+08:00

I’m calculating what’s left inside me
When everything I left were my life and my dreams
And every time you were proud of what you were not
This is the truth and it’ll be a history

I gave you everything, I gave up my life and they were all for you,
you’ve ruined everything!
I gave you everything and I gave up my life
And they were all for you! (And they were all for you)

I wonder what went wrong, it became like this
when I’m not pretty sure (No, I’m not pretty sure)
After all the crossings we’ve been through,
it’s not suppose to be like this. Why?
And every time you’re fucking proud of what you’re not
I hate the truth but still it’ll be a history

I swear you will know this somehow
Before it’s too late and dies
Realities are so complicated
I wish to see the truth shines brightly in your eyes

It’s even for me, and even for you
Just try to understand…
You and me, yeah I remember,
Look how we were meant to be!

hmmmm.

2009-06-26T01:14:00.002+08:00

you noe the feeling of wanting to apologize, but u just cant do it?
huhu
that is what i feel right now...
um.recently i got into a fight w my parents...
and now mekorg bertego...
i really wanted to apologize and be like normal again
but im afraid to take the next step.
im afraid it will get more worst...

its not about ego or whatsoever
its just...aku terlalu kecik hati ngan cdak...
tegal benda kcik jak suma tok jadi...
and im already tired to 'act like nothing happen'
i just cant do that anymore...
i am 19 years old now...
im not 9 anymore
i noe what's good and what's not...
and i feel that, im not ready to face them yet.
not now....

i noe that u just want to protect me and afraid that sth bad will happen to me...
and i am grateful for that...
but i am not someone that you can left grounded....phm x?
ohh i wish they could read this.
dr dlk gik communication in my fam is very very poor.
sometimes even if when all of us is at home, we would text each other...cthny mok pgl for dinner...walaupun jarak dekat n stuff....

i dont know what else should i say...
but i feel very very tired of all this.
rasa mcm mok lari jak...
if only we can chase off all our problems away...kan best?
dah la i got nobody to talk to rite now...
my bestfriend left me... *i miss her =(*
my ngek.................................................................. *blank*

so many tears i cried....and i haven't cry this much since...ntah la...p dh lmk laa...
maybe hal tok bukan jak sbb i emo like this.
x mungkin.
byk hal gik....kot....im not sure... =(

someone please help me....i got no strength left to face this....

finally~!

2009-06-24T18:08:00.006+08:00

well last nite was a tense...well not so tense la i think...xda la mkrg kaie sampe berkasar2...nooooo *aku x mintaaakkkk* huhuh um.just a misunderstanding between us two...beysa la nak...even we sumtimes bite our own tounge...pa gik mekorg tok as a couple.. =D

anyhoo...kmkorg dah x tmu for like 3 days...since last sunday...only god knows how much i miss him. *and he misses me too! :) * and today...wednesday...we finally met...hehe ilek mkn kat kepsi cesmall...ntah xtwuk phl ku pande ngidam kepsi tek haha then mkorg ilek at the bridge...and today...myb because mkorg dh lmk x tmu....he became the most sweet guy ever!haha byk la bnda sweet that he've done for me today...hehe *sry that detail is too personal n private to share :p * wish i can stop the time and mkorg dpt ilek dgn lbh lbh lmk huhu...
um.jez yg spoil ny...today was my 1st day period....segugut doh.uhhhh the painnnn =(

k k k remember the last post i said that i wanted to introduce izzat?hehe well tadaaaaa~!!

tok la Aizuddin Izzat! my one and only boo!hehe luv him so much dohhh!hehe and sorry girls he's taken...... by ME! mwahahahahaha *evil laugh*

ehem2.back to the storey morey.hehe...um. i just wanna say that
im sorry about last nite...
tg dtg moody and marah bu sesuka hati n um.maybe make u feel a bit disappointed in me...
sorry k? i'll try not to do that again. :p

huh.

2009-06-23T12:58:00.000+08:00

erm.i just wanna say i am very disappointed.
mun salu gtok that feeling will easily fades.
i really2 feel that i am the only one who r trying so hard.
i dont know him.
maybe he got his own way of trying to work this out.
p i dont feel it. i dont feel anything is working out.
at this point, i am confuse.
i dont feel anything.
but i do really want this to work.
it just...i feel like i am alone.

i noe he is not used to this.
but i cant do anything about that...
even if i try so hard, it just wont change...
i would try anything for us to always be together...
but its just can't happen...

please understand?
its not my choice.
i dont want this.
i want you.
i want us to be happy.
thats all...
but please dont make it more worst...
that is all i ask. =(

hello...again

2009-06-23T04:53:00.000+08:00

its been awhile since i last blogged. as u know, ive deleted my last account. for unknown reasons i guess....hehe =)

why ive started blogging again?

well last nite, izzat *who is izzat?we'll talk about that later okkk* and i talked about blogging...and he said he enjoyed reading my blog...and i shoud start blogging again........well at 1st i refused....but come to think of it...its a loooooooooooong holiday and im dead bored.....so why the hell not? hahah XD

so here we are again! welcome to my new blog! where i can complaint about my life n you guys would know about it *mcm la ada org baca* haha